Hmm, part of me is thinking of changing my blog title to reflect what my blog has now become.

I've already re-written the header text because I realised it had become out of date, that really wasn't my blog anymore.

I first started this blog in the hope of maybe meeting a few sports fans and really having a spot to air my sport related rants.

This has now become a thing of the past, something I've realised now that there was an England match and nothing about it in my blog.

I do still bring football in every so often but it's very rare.

I also looked at how my post numbers have changed, this is the post count for my time on blog:

10/7/11/18/21/55/50/51/78/80(including this one)

So what happened in January?!

I think I have an answer.

You guys happened.

All of a sudden I had blog friends and I think it changed the way I am, the way I thought.

I wanted to entertain, I wanted to socialise, I wanted my blog to be a place these friends would want to visit.

I got happier. And as such my blog has now become a lot more personal, when I got comfortable I opened up, so now this place became my sounding off board but also my place to write down thoughts, hopes, fears etc.

I have to say I'm glad it did, I feel much more at ease with what this blog is now, even though I still am in awe that anyone reads it.

So there ya go, as I near the end of a bad day full of worry and dissapointment... the fact is what this blog became was somewhere where I could openly say I've had a bad day full of worry and dissapointment.

To avoid doing work for a few seconds...

Ones for CJ:

Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]-[sin(xy)/2.362x]

Philosophy is a game with objectives and no rules. Mathematics is a game with rules and no objectives.

---

Reasons It's Great to be A Guy
- Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. (Hmm, not sure bout that one...)
- Movie nudity is virtually always female.
- You know stuff about tanks.
- A five day vacation requires only one suitcase.
- Monday Night Football.
- You don't have to monitor your friends' sex lives.
- Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
- You can open all your own jars.
- Old friends don't give you guff if you've lost or gained weight.
- Dry cleaners and haircutter's don't rob you blind.
- When clicking through the channel, you don't have to stall on every shot of someone crying.
- Your butt is never a factor in a job interview.
- All your orgasms are real.
- A beer gut does not make you invisible to the opposite sex.
- You don't have to lug a bag of useless stuff around everywhere you go. (hmm, *looking at my work bag*)
- You can go to the bathroom without a support group.
- Your last name stays put.
- You can leave a hotel bed unmade.
- When your work is criticized, you don't have to panic that everyone secretly hates you. (You KNOW they do...)
- You can kill your own food.
- The garage is all yours.
- You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
- You see the humor in Terms of Endearment.

I didn't write those by the way... now, who's going to be the first with the reasons it's great to be a woman? (Well, before I do it tomorrow )

---

From Mysterious Me:

Reasons It's Great to be A Gay
- Phone conversations take all night but you hear ALL the gossip.
- Movie nudity is virtually always female so you don’t get horny in the cinema.
- You know stuff about wanks.
- A five day vacation requires only one houseboy.
- Monday Night Makeovers.
- You get to monitor your friends' sex lives.
- Your bathroom lines are interesting.
- You can open all your own bars.
- You instantly notice if your friends have lost or gained weight.
- Dry cleaners and haircutter's offer you wine and a chance to gain the gossip missed from the all night phone call.
- When clicking through the channel, you have to stall on every shot of someone wearing something hideous!
- Your future employers butt is a big factor in a job interview.
- All your orgasms are real.
- A beer gut is just a challenge to your personal trainer.
- You have someone to lug a bag of useless stuff around everywhere you go.
- You can go to the bathroom without needing to pee.
- Your last name stays put.
- You can leave a hotel bed made better than it was when you arrived.
- When your work is criticized you get impromptu supportive drinkies with your girls.
- You can kill your own stylist.
- The garage is where the bondage equipment is kept.
- You get extra credit for the slightest act of campness.
- You see the humor in Brokeback Mountain.

Hehe, sorry Ros, I'm nicking your wierd ebay title for a single post!

Just saw bout this on telly...

A guy decides to sell his car on ebay.

He realises he needs to put on a picture and he only has one.

So the car is placed on ebay with a lovely picture... of it on it's side in a ditch!

Nutter!

Oh, and I had another scurrilous no pre-chat invite today Don't people realise you don't just get down to it, forechat is important!

So Blog was slow last night and now I wake up to go check my train... and my internet is down

As you may know this has happened a lot lately and I'm getting a little ticked off.

AOL's helpdesk did their best chocolate teapot/infateable dartboard impression and took a long premium rate call to tell me there was nothing wrong and that they couldn't help me further because the PC is the other end of the house to the main socket (which is sat next to the front door).

So let me get this straight... you wont help until I redesign my house... thanks...

Needless to say we're thinking of changing net suppliers soon... SO, I come to my point and a blatent and unashamed plea for information.

What broadband supplier do you use? How reliable is it? Is it good value for money?

Thank you in advance!

An original idea by the Esteemed Mr G I also nicked from Uberlistichmeister Helly and the ever wonderful lovely_kleptomaniac (weird to see something stolen in this direction, eh, Ros? )

It's all about music, songs that are important to you in some way or has memories attatched.

Now normally I'm a pig for picking music because I hate to have to choose and I have too much but I decided I'd give it a shot.

These aren't my favourite records, just ones that have a meaning.

1) Never Walk Alone - The Kop
Had to be here, too many memories of "singing" it during both great and truly sad moments. This is a song that I've sung/heard sung at European Cup Finals and memorial services/funerals.

2) Pure - Lightning Seeds
I think lots of people get those moments when you realise it's possible for your parents to like the same things as you. After he heard me playing it my Dad asked about borrowing the CD and loved it, especially this song, it stayed forever something that linked us.

3) Bohemian Rhapsody, Hotel California, Hey Jude.
Not anything major here although they are all quality songs they're just songs that mean a lot to anyone who works in radio... Mainly because you can put them on, go to the bathroom, make a cup of coffee and a sandwich and STILL get down a long time before they finish! Trust me, you hear one of the above on radio and 8 out of 10 times it's cause the presenter has either been caught short or has lost a guest.

4) Champagne Supernova - Oasis
Don't know why I love this song, It just hits me. I listened to it a lot when I was late teens and in an Oasis phase and then, all of a sudden the other year it appeared on my MP3 player on random (think I wrote a post about it actually!) and I still loved it.

5) Hello - Sugarbomb
This one appeared not that long ago on my blog, at the time I first found this song (it was on the soundtrack of a movie I like, Van Wilder: Party Liason) I was in a long distance relationship and the lyrics could not have been more perfect. Went a while when I couldn't listen to it for heartache but I can now, and I'm glad about that.

6) Boulevard of Broken Dreams - Green Day
I listen to this and quite often think... yeah, there I am.

7) We Have All The Time In The World - Louis Armstrong
I drove the farewell show for a very old timer radio presenter and this was his goodbye tune but even before that I knew this was one of those songs that really mean something.

8) Learn To Fly - Foo Fighters
More lyrics that work pretty well for me. Plus one of the best videos ever

9) Smile - Supernaturals
Do it, this song is just aq motto for life that I try, and often fail, to fullfill.

10) Ready To Go - Republica
Mates, drink, loud music, going out to the pub. Nuff said.

Wow, I did it, 10 songs with a reason.

Just a quickie before I go to work...

Woke up this morning with the Bangles' Manic Monday in my head...

God, I've worked in radio too long, even my subconscious is after corny links...

I have mixed feelings about stereotypes because I can see both sides of them.

I dislike tarring everyone with a single brush, for example if people took the Devonian stereotype I'd be a farmer going ooo-arr and trying to sell you manure.

BUT... there really are people like that out there, and once in a while you can run smack-dab into a stereotype so bang on it's scary.

As I have chronicled earlier (I love that word, makes me sound important) I purchased a new watch yesterday and I will admit, I bought it from Argos, mainly because it was cheap and easy for the adjustments.

So there I am at the Argos jewellery counter waiting to pick it up when I hear "awww, Britney, look at the ring!" "aww mum, it's bewdifuwl" in a voice that appeared at first to be an excellent impression of Vicky Pollard.

I turn slightly to take in the girl who has now appeared next to me.

There is Britney, in all her flourescent white with pink trim tracksuited "good"ness along with earrings you could have perched a parrot safely in, more makeup than is normally seen outside of a Boots Megastore and of course the bright pink Dunlop trainers.

All 13 or 14 years of her, going gaga over a £3.99 Elizabeth Duke ring, proclaiming to her mum - I kid you not - that it could be "a great engagement ring".

Heavens.

Don't get me wrong, we are graced by one person on here, B, who proves the stereotype of a chav is often wrong but sometimes, just sometimes...

As we reach that point where we're teetering on the brink of another working week here's some tips on how to keep a healthy level of insanity in the workplace...

- Laminate all your company's forms and documents, then giggle manically as people try to fill them in. (Specially for Viera)

- Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good point Sparky." "No I'm sorry I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Chachi."

- Suggest that beer be put in the soda machine.

- When printing yell "laser printers to stun!"

- Include a piece of your children's artwork as a cover page for all reports that you write. (If you don't have children, draw stick figures yourself.)

- Schedule meetings for 4:14 pm.

- Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair dancing.

- Agree to organize the company Christmas party. Hold it at McDonald's Playland. Charge everyone $15 each.

- Send e-mail to the rest of the company telling them what you're doing. For example "If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathroom" or "just popping for a coffee, back in five".

- No matter what anyone asks you, reply "Okay."

- Put your garbage can on your desk. Label it "IN."

- Plant a hedge around your cubicle.

- Build models of the Seven Wonders of the World using empty soda cans.

- Put a chair facing a printer, sit there all day and tell people you're waiting for your document.

- Arrive at a meeting late, say you're sorry, but you didn't have time for lunch, and you're going to be nibbling during the meeting. During the meeting eat 5 entire raw potatoes.

- Insist that your e-mail address is "zena_goddess_of_fire@companyname.com" (Hmm, we could have some great blog emails like that... eg, helly_goddess_of_lists@blog.co.uk... *brain working*)

- Every time someone asks you to do something, ask them to sign a waiver.

- Every time someone asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that.

- Send e-mail to yourself engaging yourself in an intelligent debate about the direction of one of your company's products. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.

- Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)

- Name all your pens and insist that meetings can't begin until they're all present.

- Come to work in your pajamas.

- Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Always wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is a different gender than you are.)

I still can't get my head around not working on Saturdays, I keep thinking it's Sunday!

Don't consider that a complaint though, I'm more than happy to get my weekends free, especially with the stinkin mess this week has been.

For the first time since last Sunday night I actually feel slightly calm and mildly contented... the most I get at the moment

It is slightly gutting though, bought myself a watch today, the first time I've had a watch for ages, and I mean counting in years ages.

The battery went in my old one many moons ago and as I had my mobile I couldn't be bothered to get a new one.

So now I have... and have to wait until Thursday cause the strap needs a link taken out

I am NOT a patient man...

Now Edited:

Purple Dragon has tagged me (well, I did ask...) with the Letter Meme!

You get given a letter and have to come up with 10 things starting with that letter that describe you...

She (slightly cruely I feel ) gave me the letter 'G'

(OK, so the first two I'm going to nick from my tags...)

1) Geek, and proud!

2) Genuine. I like this one because what you see is what you get on here, this really is me (scarily).

3) Gadget lover. Flashing lights, shiney metal, microchips, LCD screens... gimme, gimme, gimme!

4) Gregarious... to C&P from Chambers Dictionary: gregarious adj liking the company of other people; sociable.

5) Gentleman. Well, I try anyway

6) Galled. Irritated. Right now I am with things happening anyway!

7) Guy. Well, I am one!

8) Giant sports fan (I know, cheating )

9) Geyser... Periodically the standard calm will be broken by a short burst of action...

10) Gordon Bennett I found 10! Hehe, ok, as that was seen as cheating... Generous. I try to be, I love the smile on someone's face when I can give them something that means a lot to them.

Hehe, that's harder than you may think...

Liverpool's Mark Gonzales has been sent home in disgrace from Chile's European tour...

The reason?

Having a young woman in his hotel room

I love that misheard lyric Hearing the song now means I have to hear that

I have had a pig-awful week, today was a nightmare, nothing got done, everyone got stressed, I spent half my time doing things that weren't in the job description and the other half fighting the work software that's five mill of total rubbish...

Bah... Thankfully it's now the weekend!

All hail the weekend! Specially now that there's no football so I get it off

Oh, and just to point out the truth that some people invite without reading I shall now name and shame...

Gloss, yes YOU Gloss.

You obviously failed to read the "Sorry" post that was, in fact, dedicated to you and your erroneous invite before inviting me... again!

I think you most profusely for proving me right! (It doesn't happen often.)

Looks like we're without Rooney for the World Cup then! The news is it's going to be six weeks before he can even train lightly let alone anything else.

Having said that I suppose we do have a handful of good FIT players for the world cup, just maybe not many with creativity.

Course having said that, Aaron Lennon (sorry Ros, I know he's Spurs...) did look pretty damn good last night running past people on the wing and his delivery was good too, I think he should be a pick for the starting line-up if he can repeat that form.

...to another person who's friend invite I denied.

It's nothing personal but we've never spoken... plus to be honest I'm not totally sure you're 100% kosher so I denied.

If you really do want to be my friend chat a bit then we'll see.

I'm afraid I'm sticking with my rule that the people on my friends list are people I chat to, I dont randomly add everyone to get the pleasure of a three digit friend total and to be able to think, gee what a beloved person I am.

Mainly cause this is me, the chance of me thinking that is minimal!

So to the people on my list I say, I hope you know it means I really do class you a friend.

To anyone not on my list? Comment on my blog, chat to me if I appear on a blog near you or on yours.

But if we've never chatted and you ask me to be your friend I'm going to know it's not because you like me, it's that you want a large friends list.

Sorry and thank you!

- Don't assume the telephone calls are coming from another house.

- When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it's really dead.

- Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

- Don't go into the basement to check the power when the lights go out!

- If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. However, it will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared. This also applies to kids who speak with somebody else's voice.

- When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER split up and go it alone.

- Don't have sex. Especially if you've noticed a few of your friends are missing!

- As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open a portal to Hell.

-Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt. This would apply to any other house of the dead as well.

- If you're searching for something which caused a loud noise and find out that it's just the cat, don't stand their sighing with relief, GET THE HECK OUT!

- If appliances start operating by themselves, don't check for short circuits; JUST GET OUT!

- Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.

- If you find a town which looks deserted, there's probably a good reason for it. Don't stop and look around.

- Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you're doing.

- If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you are of the female persuasion. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely ambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.

From Sminchin:

If you're blonde and well-endowed, you'll be the first to die.

Lovely Miss T's addition:

If you stand glued to a spot screaming, you are very likely to die!

And some more:

- If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, kill them immediately.

- Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, Arkham (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

- If your car runs out of gas at night on a lonely road, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help. If you think that it is strange because you thought you had 3/4 of a tank, shoot yourself instead. You are going to die anyway, and will most likely be eaten.

- Beware of strangers bearing strange tools. For example: chainsaws, staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any devices made from deceased companions.

- If you find that your house is built upon a cemetery, now is the time to move in with the in-laws. This also applies to houses that had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic practices in your house.

Someone seems to be copying out the instruction bit for personal tags into my tag list... and those of others.

"Characterize this user and profile with tags like, handsome- etc."

Very strange.

It is a very quiet night tonight.

Thankfully I had a slightly better day, thanks also to some great people on here who can cheer me up and put a smile on my face.

Work still sucks though, one "up"grade to the system and trying to work is nigh on impossible now

*stretching* funny how my back gets tight when I'm doing the PC shifts at work....

Over on the Footy Fans board Mr G is suggesting a Bloggy World Cup Sweepstakes, one seeded and one non-seeded team per entry, anyone interested?

To sign up go HERE.

Terms and conditions... no refund will be given to the poor bugger that draws England

I've lost a friend and the worst part is I don't know where from... I hate this because as you know from previous posts I like to keep my friends list up to date and elite so I should be able to tell who I've lost!

(If it's you... sorry!)

Had a better-ish day thanks to not working, I switched my day off to today from Saturday cause they needed me in to work then.

Not done much though, just lazed about really and wasted time...

So, anyway, although I'm still not great I promise, much less whinging today!!!

My last couple of posts have been far too depressed so lets put on a happy face with some music.

1) Inspired by a convo with Princess Jun, who appears to be somewhat of a muse to me if recent posts are anything to go by...

Joey Ramone - What a Wonderful World

2) Just one cause I love it.

Sugarbomb - Hello

OK, lets just round up the day...

Already feeling bad after a good friend tells me over the weekend she's busted up with her fiance.

Got up too late to tidy myself up properly.

Have a train journey that feels five times longer than normal as I stress about work.

Get in to find one of my friends in work won't be in today as he's lost his mother.

Find they've "upgraded" our work software over the weekend... which means the system spends much of the day crashing or going slow and I write just four pages, two the system loses and two identical pages to replace the lost ones.

Get rung to say the storm has weakened one of the trees in our back garden and it's come down, thankfully not on anyone but not exactly being tidy about it.

Spend the rest of the day feeling completely out of control of everything and more than a little down.

Decide I REALLY need to be as bit more positive before I scare everyone off my blog...

PS, thanks for the worried comments before guys.

PPS, reading round the blogs has EVERYONE had a bad day today? It's time to check the planetary alignment.

I have had a bad day...

A VERY bad day...

If an infinite number of rednecks riding in an infinite number of pickup trucks fire an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway signs, they will eventually produce all the world's great literary works in Braille.

Saw an ad for something today that asked "Are you unlucky?"

Now, y'all know my views on my life so instantly my brain put forward the thought yes... but then I realised how short sighted I was being.

I will admit (mainly because you already know) that I am in a Death Valley sized dry spell at the moment so when it comes to love I'm unlucky but when I look at the rest of my life, I don't think I can honestly say I am.

WORK: Not great at the moment and a bit morale destroying but I still have a job doing something I enjoy and at an hourly rate that means I wont starve.

FAMILY: Losing my Dad last year was awful but I look around and I realise how lucky I have been/am with my family.

My parents loved me, treated me well and pushed me to be the best I could be without ever making me feel I hadn't lived up to their expectations, they never made me feel bad when I failed but alweays made me feel great when I succeeded.

I have two great sisters I still see, one of whom hasd a fiance who is a brother to me, I even spent four hours over there today with them.

Also the extended family, aunts, uncles, cousins are all close.

FRIENDS: Getting the bad things out of the way first... you could take a map of England and do a join the dots of all my good friends without ever coming inside 30 miles of my house so meeting up is difficult...

But I have great friends, we keep in touch often, we make each other laugh and when we do get together we have a superb time.

And then there's you lot, in the last 9 months I've met some really wonderful people on here, just look at the friends list on the right for that. There's people on there I never would've met without the luck of finding first this site then their blog. There's people on that list who are as important to me as my RL friends, after all, friendship is about personality, and in a personal site such as this it shines through.

So, you know what, I'm going to be positive, and I might remember to read back to this post when I'm down because ignoring the minimal importance of a relationship I think I'm actually pretty lucky in some things.

We've all been interviewed for jobs. And, we've all spent most of those interviews thinking about what not to do. Don't bite your nails. Don't fidget. Don't interrupt. Don't belch.

If we did any of the don'ts, we knew we'd disqualify ourselves instantly, but some job applicants go light years beyond this.

In a survey of top personnel executives from 100 major American corporations these stories of unusual behavior by job applicants came to light...

- "...stretched out on the floor to fill out the job application."

- "She wore a Walkman and said she could listen to me and the music at the same time."

- "A balding candidate abruptly excused himself. Returned to office a few minutes later, wearing a hairpiece."

- "...asked to see interviewer's resume to see if the personnel executive was qualified to judge the candidate."

- "... announced she hadn't had lunch and proceeded to eat a hamburger and french fries in the interviewer's office - wiping the ketchup on her sleeve."

- "Stated that, if he were hired, he would demonstrate his loyalty by having the corporate logo tattooed on his forearm."

- "Interrupted to phone his therapist for advice on answering specific interview questions."

- "When I asked him about his hobbies, he stood up and started tap dancing around my office."

- "At the end of the interview, while I stood there dumbstruck, went through my purse, took out a brush, brushed his hair, and left."

- "...pulled out a Polaroid camera and snapped a flash picture of me. Said he collected photos of everyone who interviewed him."

- "Said he wasn't interested because the position paid too much."

- "While I was on a long-distance phone call, the applicant took out a copy of Penthouse, and looked through the photos only, stopping longest at the centerfold."

- "During the interview, an alarm clock went off from the candidate's brief case. He took it out, shut it off, apologized and said he had to leave for another interview."

- "A telephone call came in for the job applicant. It was from his wife. His side of the conversation went like this: 'Which company? When do I start? What's the salary?' I said, 'I assume you're not interested in conducting the interview any further.' He promptly responded, 'I am as long as you'll pay me more.' I didn't hire him, but later found out there was no other job offer. It was a scam to get a higher offer."

- "His attache [case] opened when he picked it up and the contents spilled, revealing ladies' undergarments and assorted makeup and perfume."

- "Candidate said he really didn't want to get a job, but the unemployment office needed proof that he was looking for one."

- "...asked who the lovely babe was, pointing to the picture on my desk. When I said it was my wife, he asked if she was home now and wanted my phone number. I called security."

- "Pointing to a black case he carried into my office, he said that if he was not hired, the bomb would go off. Disbelieving, I began to state why he would never be hired and that I was going to call the police. He then reached down to the case, flipped a switch, and ran. No one was injured, but I did need to get a new desk."

If we could shrink the earth's population to a village of 100 people, with everything else remaining the same, it would look like this:

There would be:

* 57 Asians
* 21 Europeans
* 14 from the Western Hemisphere,
* 8 Africans,

* 52 would be female
* 48 would be male

* 70 would be non-white
* 30 would be white

* 70 would be non-Christian
* 30 would be Christian

* 95 would be heterosexual
* 5 would be homosexual

* 6 people would own 59% of the world's wealth, and all 6 would be from the United States

* 80 would live in substandard housing

* 70 would be unable to read

* 50 would suffer from malnutrition

* 1 would be near death
* 1 would be near birth

* 1 would have a college education

* 1 would own a computer

* 0 would play oboe

As LJ is doing one I thought I'd give it a try, mine might not be as underwear based as hers though... well, only by association...

"The longer you're single the harder it becomes to break the habit."

I have been tagged by a certain soul we all know and lo..li...know

List ten fictional figures you would have sex with (in no particular order), then tag five people to do the same.

Hmm... I'm guessing I can't list a fictional girlfriend...

By the way, I'm switching it to "go out with" cause if it's sex then it's largely physical, I'm giving mental reasons too...

1) Andromeda - The cybernetic one, cute and intelligent, a damning combination.

2) Amy from Futurama - disturbingly hot for a cartoon...

3) Storm from X-Men - A date that will ALWAYS make sure the weather is what you want it to be! (Cuddles in a warm